Saturday, December 15, 2007

Stuff I've discovered lately

1. Making people smile is one of the most amazing things that I can do

2. The ONLY time someone speaks the truth is when they are angry

3. People DO NOT speak the truth when drunk

4. I miss my family, but nothing can be done about that

5. Don't dwell on the past unless you're dwelling on something that makes you happy

6. Being at a crossroads is one of the most exciting times in life. Scary, but exciting

7. There is absolutely NOTHING more important in this world than love.

8. I really really like being me

9. Girly giggling is a great release

10. Growing up is awesome

11. My Nonna is always with me

12. Learning to trust again is not as hard as once thought

13. I am so lucky to have such amazing friends

14. I am so lucky. Period.

15. I do not have any regrets in life, only lessons to be learned. Besides...how can you regret something if at one stage in your life you wanted it?

16. I like to learn lessons the hard way. I thrive from the good, grow from the bad

17. I'm talented, and that is good

18. I've always known that everything happens for a reason...but now I KNOW that it does

19. Art is magic, magic is fire, fire is beauty, beauty is love, love is passion, passion sets you free.

20. Everything comes full circle

21. Karma is the strongest force in this world...even stronger than love

22. Silence can speak volumes

23. Even though I don't like The Beatles' music, I co-incidentally live by everything that they stood for.

24. I give affection freely, but never my heart. That you must earn

25. The moment that I stopped wishing for something is when I received it

Monday, December 10, 2007

Weird is good...

Things are weird. Things have always been weird, I guess, but now they are the epitome of weird. At least I think that's how you spell epitome...

Some of you know I'm going through a strange, yet wonderful enlightening time right now, and those of you who don't...well, you do now. My mind is annoying me by thinking too much, as usual. But this time, I can't switch it off, no matter how hard I try.

I miss people - a lot.
I miss travelling - a lot.
I miss time to myself - a lot.
I miss not having a solid creative outlet - most of all.

I'm reaching an epiphany...of sorts. I'm analysing everything I've ever known, ever experienced, ever believed in up until now. I guess it helps to do that, in order to understand yourself better. I won't change, only grow from my knowledge.

I'm writing a lot lately, getting stuff out of my head, which helps. Nothing helps as much as making a new film though, but I don't have the time or energy to organise actors, crew, locations, catering, permissions, film processing, editing....my head hurts just thinking about it, so a film will have to wait. And my camera needs a service before I start anything.

I feel like some higher power is trying to steer me in a direction that I'm dying to go in, but I keep hitting a brick wall. In my frustration, I choose the 'clear path', only to find it makes me unhappy, and wanting to run right into the brick wall, even if that makes me crack my head open and all my little thoughts spill out onto the footpath. Making me vulnerable as all fuck.

Geddit?

Yeah, it's tough. Hey -that's life.
But no matter how hard the road, I can still say I'm loving the journey

Cryssie xxx