My world has fallen apart. I recieved some pretty crappy news today that will affect me a lot over the next few months. I don't really know how to handle it, but for the moment, I guess, all I can tell myself is that it just wasn't meant to be. Although, from the start...I knew that already. From the word GO, everything felt wrong about it. So I guess this should come as no surprise. It's fate's way of telling me that yes, it just wasn't right. But I still feel so wrong. It's probably just shock. Tomorrow I'll be fine about it, I'm sure. That's the way things work out.
I suppose I didn't really need the extra kick in the guts on top of it all, but maybe that was a sign that it was bad for me, bad for my energy, that I didn't deserve that treatment. Or maybe, in my upset state, I misunderstood. Either way, I guess I should be happy. I kind of never wanted it to start with. Things that are convienient never made me happy, for sure.
I'm going to take this as a blessing. The hurt, it only stings for a moment. Opportunity pacifies the pain. Now I'm free for all kinds of opportunities. I suppose this is where real life starts. It's going to be a hard road for a while, but I'll get through it. Things could be a whole shitload worse than this, and I'm so glad they're not.
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